


The Promise

by lizwontcry



Category: Breaking Bad, Breaking Bad RPF
Genre: Bryan is Kind of a Dick, M/M, angsty
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-04
Updated: 2021-01-04
Packaged: 2021-03-14 07:36:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,087
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28541904
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lizwontcry/pseuds/lizwontcry
Summary: Aaron thinks about excusing himself and leaving to go back to his hotel. This is a nightmare, actually. He just made a huge confession to Bryan, who didn’t even acknowledge himat all.It’s a weird feeling, to be mad at Bryan. It’s not the kind of relationship they have; Aaron can’t remember a time Bryan has even disappointed him, much less made him this achingly sad.
Relationships: Bryan Cranston/Aaron Paul
Comments: 8
Kudos: 8





	The Promise

**Author's Note:**

> Hi, tired of me yet?
> 
> This is basically the opposite of the last story I posted. My brain hijacked me into thinking about what if Aaron's confession went a different way and Bryan was a real asshole about it. Usually everything I write about them is all sunshine and rainbows so please enjoy the drama of it all. 
> 
> This was written for fun and does not express the views of Aaron or Bryan or their abilities to consume alcohol.
> 
> Thanks for reading.

**NEW YORK - 2017**

“What do you think this guy wants? Is he a ‘yo, bitch’ or a ‘say my name’ kind of guy?” Bryan chuckles as yet another overweight middle-aged guy with a weird moustache approaches them.

“He’s definitely the one who knocks,” Aaron says. “I’ll bet a hundred on it.”

“Deal,” Bryan says. 

The man finally makes it to their table and gets right in Bryan’s face, barely acknowledging Aaron. Aaron nods at him with a grin as he says, “Oh, my god! I can’t believe you two are eating at my favorite restaurant! Can I please get a picture with y’all?!” 

“I don’t see why not,” Bryan replies. Aaron waits for it as the guy fishes the phone out of his pocket. He takes the picture--Aaron doesn’t think he was even in the shot--and then looks at Bryan expectantly.

“Can you please--I’m so sorry to ask this but I would just kick myself if I didn’t! Can you please just say ‘I am the danger!’ just once? It would make my life!” 

Aaron chuckles. He had basically called it.

Even though Aaron knows Bryan would rather stab himself in the thigh with his fork than say this stupid line (well, this _brilliant_ line, but overrated for sure--he and Bryan both agree on that) out loud one more time, they _are_ out in public and Bryan would look like a real dick if he said no. 

“Sure--what’s your name?”

“Henry,” the dude says.

“Henry-- _you are the danger,_ ” Bryan says in his best “Walter White is a bad ass” voice. The guy claps his hands and laughs like an overexcited child. He thanks Bryan and then bounds off to whomever he’s going to tell this story to countless times.

“You owe me,” Aaron says. “I mean, same scene and everything.”

“Yeah, yeah. I owe you, all right.”

Aaron takes a sip of whiskey and wonders for the millionth time if this moment is the right one to bring it up. He’s not going to chicken out this time. He made a promise to himself--he owes this to himself.

Or maybe he _is_ going to chicken out this time, because he just can’t say it. Instead, Aaron nervously folds and unfolds the napkin in his lap. Bryan looks at him curiously.

“Hey, are you okay? You seem a little, I don’t know, distracted tonight. And you’ve barely touched your spicy tuna rolls, and they’re your favorite.”

It’s true. Aaron just doesn’t have an appetite tonight--he has too much on his mind. But Bryan just basically gave him the perfect opportunity. If he can’t do it now, he might as well keep it to himself forever.

“Well. Now that you mention it… I’ve kind of been wanting to talk to you about something. It’s a little awkward but I think I just need to say it.”

Bryan furrows his brow, looking concerned. “What is it? You know you can tell me anything…”

Ever since they started looking into the mezcal operation, they’ve been growing closer and closer. When the show ended four years ago, they were so busy that they rarely got a chance to see each other, which truly sucked. Aaron loves spending so much time with Bryan now, learning about the business, coming up with ideas and plans and going to meetings together. Not to mention the upcoming trips to Mexico they have planned, which Aaron is very much looking forward to.

And something else has been happening, too. Something he can no longer ignore. Something he doesn’t _want_ to ignore.

Aaron takes another gulp of whiskey. Bryan puts his hand on Aaron’s shoulder, which is actually not helping. He’s giving him his full attention, with the particular look on his face that has always comforted Aaron. That’s Bryan in a nutshell--comforting, calm, cool. And Aaron loves it all.

“Well, you already know that I love you. And I do. And I always have. But lately… oh, man. Okay, I’m just going to say it--I can’t stop thinking about you. When I close my eyes, I can’t stop picturing being alone with you… kissing you… you kissing me. And more. Than kissing.”

Aaron avoids Bryan’s eyes as he drinks some water. Bryan isn’t saying anything. He’s not doing anything. But Aaron isn’t finished yet.

“I’ve talked about it with Lauren, like a lot. And she would be okay if we wanted to, I don’t know, figure it out? And I do want to figure it out--I mean, if you want to, obviously. Sometimes I get the vibe that you _do_ want the same thing, but if you don’t, then please tell me now. Please tell me because I can’t go another day without knowing how you feel. And if we’re _not_ on the same page here, that’s totally okay. I will still love you anyway. Okay. That’s all I have to say.”

Well, it’s not exactly eloquent; it’s not exactly the speech Aaron had planned to make, but it gets the point across.

But… Bryan isn’t even looking at him. He’s staring at his bottle of beer. Usually Aaron has a good read on what Bryan is thinking--it’s what makes their partnership so easy and productive--but he can’t tell what’s going on in his head now. Oh, fuck, Aaron has made a huge mistake. This is bad. So bad.

“Bryan… please say something. I can’t--”

“Christian! Oh, my goodness, hello!” Aaron is interrupted by Bryan getting up to shake the hand of Christian Slater, who is walking by with his wife. 

“Hi, Bryan! Oh, and Aaron, too. What a nice surprise,” Christian says, nodding at him. Aaron gets up and shakes his hand, too. Although he does like Christian and a night out with him is always one for the record books, this is obviously not a good time. But Bryan doesn’t seem to agree, because he invites Christian to sit at the table with them. 

Aaron thinks about excusing himself and leaving to go back to his hotel. This is a nightmare, actually. He just made a huge confession to Bryan, who didn’t even acknowledge him _at all._ It’s a weird feeling, to be mad at Bryan. It’s not the kind of relationship they have; Aaron can’t remember a time Bryan has even disappointed him, much less made him this achingly sad. It fucking sucks. 

But he doesn’t leave, because as the night continues, he sees Bryan is determined to drink as much as possible. He orders beer after beer and then switches to wine, which Aaron knows from experience is not going to end well. Even though Bryan’s a big boy and can take care of himself, Aaron doesn’t want to leave him in this state. 

“Hey, Aaron, did you know Christian almost got the part of Walter White? Wouldn’t that be interesting, with the two of you instead of us?” Bryan laughs and drinks more red wine. 

“Yeah, man, I knew that.” Everybody knows that. Why is Bryan telling him this again?

Aaron can’t help but think if Christian _did_ play Walter White, at least Aaron wouldn’t be sitting at this table feeling like absolute dog shit after getting his heart broken. But whatever.

“Lucky son of a bitch,” Christian mumbles under his breath, and they all laugh. Aaron does too, although his heart is obviously not in it.

Christian and his wife order their sushi and the night continues for another long and excruciating hour or so. Bryan is now almost belligerently drunk. It’s so unlike him that Aaron wonders if his confession is why he’s drinking so much--which is actually almost comforting in a way. But not really.

When the check comes, Bryan insists on paying it. While he’s busy with the waiter, Christian nudges Aaron and says, “Hey, is he okay? Should I take him home with us or--”

“He’s fine,” Aaron sighs. “I’ll make sure he gets to his hotel safe and sound.”

“Good. I’ve never seen him like this before.”

“I know, I haven’t either,” Aaron says bitterly. “Actually--can you help me get him in a cab? I just don’t want to see 'This is Your Brain on Meth’ headlines on TMZ or something.”

“Of course,” Christian says, nodding. The two of them manage to grab Bryan--god, he’s just so fucking _heavy_ \--and put him into a cab waiting nearby. Aaron thanks Christian profusely and then reluctantly gets into the cab with Bryan. Bryan falls asleep on his shoulder after slurring about how nice it was to see Christian. The cab ride only takes 12 minutes but it feels more like 12 hours.

When they pull up to the St. Regis, Aaron again grabs Bryan’s arm to get him out of the cab, and he stops at the front desk of the hotel since Bryan has no idea where his key is or even remembers the room number. The receptionist looks sympathetically at Aaron as she hands him the key and tells him it’s room 422. 

They’re both silent on the elevator, silent as Aaron guides him to his room, silent as he opens the door and watches as Bryan stumbles to his bed and collapses on it. Aaron sighs, because he knows he can’t leave this idiot alone in his intoxicated state. 

“Hey. Did you have fun tonight?” Bryan slurs from his position on the bed. 

How can he even ask a dumbass question like that? Aaron just doesn’t get it. 

“I guess. It was cool to see Christian.”

Bryan grunts unattractively. “Come here,” he says in a weird voice. 

“I’m fine over here,” Aaron says stubbornly. He’s sitting on the sofa by the TV, which is probably where he’ll end up sleeping--if he even can sleep.

“Please? Come on, you’re so far away,” Bryan says. It almost sounds like a demand. Aaron exhales as he sits by Bryan on the bed. 

“What’s up, man? We really should get you in bed--you should drink some water first, though. I’ll get you some--”

Bryan grabs Aaron and pulls him down on the bed. Aaron is too shocked to immediately move out of the way as Bryan kind of sloppily tries to kiss him, sticking his tongue in his mouth like he’s digging for gold or something. Ironic, since Aaron had been hoping the night would end in a kiss--but obviously not like this. Not anything like this. 

“Bryan--what the hell, man? Get off me,” Aaron mutters, and pushes him away. 

“What--isn’t this what you want?” Bryan slurs. Aaron is bewildered by this weird and terrible version of one of his best friends. 

“No, that is definitely _not _what I want.” Bryan moves towards him again, but Aaron hurries off the bed. Just in time for Bryan to throw up all over the comforter.__

__Fuckin’ great._ _

__Aaron manages to pull Bryan up and basically throw him on the sofa. He calls the front desk to have a new comforter sent up. Bryan has figured out how to turn on the TV and is flipping through the channels. Fine, whatever, anything to keep this asshole occupied. Aaron takes the comforter from the apologetic looking housekeeper, assures her that he can handle it himself, and puts it on the bed. He finds a bottle of water in the mini fridge (which probably costs like $15, but Bryan’s being such an asshole that Aaron doesn’t care about spending his precious money) and hands it to Bryan._ _

__“Drink it.” Bryan throws it on the ground like some kind of idiot chimpanzee._ _

__“Are you serious? Drink the water, Bryan, or you’re going to have a really bad morning.” He opens the water and thankfully Bryan takes it without another word. He drinks the whole thing._ _

__“Now go to bed. I’m tired, and you’re drunk.”_ _

__“I don’t wanna.” Bryan says belligerently._ _

__“Too bad. Come on, get your ass up.” Aaron grabs him and while he resists at first, Bryan finally lets him drag him to bed. Man, Aaron’s going to be sore from lifting this fucker all night._ _

__He helps Bryan take his shoes off, his suit jacket, his button down shirt, his pants. Yeah, he’s had fantasies about all this before, but in very different circumstances. He pulls the new comforter over Bryan, has him drink a little more water, and then turns the fucking light off when Bryan quickly falls asleep. Thank god._ _

__Aaron finds a pillow and a blanket from the closet and tries his hardest to go to bed. But it’s almost as though the lights and the sounds of New York City mock him, make fun of him for opening his heart to Bryan. As though Bryan would ever feel the same way._ _

____

*****

The relentless pounding of his temples is what wakes Bryan up the next day. It’s probably the worst headache of his entire life and he’s only been awake for two minutes.

He hears the sink running in the bathroom and wonders who the hell is in the room with him. What the hell kind of trouble did he get into last night? Fuck. But it’s just Aaron who comes around the corner with a glass of water and a damp towel. Bryan has never been so happy to see him. And that’s saying a lot.

“Hey, you’re awake. No, no, don’t try to get up, I’m sure you feel like shit. Here, drink this. Hold on, I’ll get some Advil.”

He hands Bryan the glass of water and arranges the damp, cool towel on Bryan’s forehead. Bryan instantly feels a little relief.

Aaron brings him the Advil and sits on the bed while Bryan swallows it.

“Thank you. I’m pretty sure I don’t deserve you being so good to me, but I appreciate it anyway.”

He may be hungover to hell, but he sees the wounded look that appears on Aaron’s face for half a second before he looks normal again.

“If you feel okay, I think I’m gonna take off, man. I didn’t get much sleep and I have a Path production meeting in a few hours.”

Bryan nods, but there’s something he needs to say here. He just doesn’t know what. God, what the hell happened last night? Why did he drink so much? Wait, didn’t Aaron tell him something important--oh. _Fuck._

Bryan groans. “Oh, god, Aaron. I fucked up, didn’t I? I really fucked up.”

“What do you mean?” Aaron asks. Bryan sees how tired Aaron looks, how his usually beautiful blue eyes are puffy and rimmed with red, how he’s not really meeting Bryan’s eyes. Oh, shit. Aaron is mad at him. Of course he is.

“Look, I don’t know exactly what I did--or said--last night, but I have a feeling it was unforgivable. I’m sorry, Aaron. I remember. I remember now what you told me. You opened your heart to me and I… I panicked. I panicked, and I regret it.” What else can he possibly say to make this better? 

“It’s okay. I’ve thought about it a lot and, well, I get it. Of course you don’t feel the same way, and that’s fine. Just forget about it, okay? I don’t regret telling you, but… I can’t stay here. You know?”

“Please, Aaron. Please don’t leave yet. Hear me out. Can I come over there? Sit next to you?”

Aaron looks like that’s the last thing he wants. “Yeah. I guess.”

Bryan slowly gets up--ouch, fuck, what the fuck--and makes his way to Aaron. He takes Aaron’s hand. Aaron still won’t make eye contact.

“You told me something really beautiful, and like I said, I panicked. You were brave and I was a coward. I don’t even know why I reacted like that, because… I feel the same way. I can’t stop thinking about you, either. Holding you, touching you… and kissing you.”

Aaron finally looks into his eyes. He wipes a few stray tears from his own eyes. “Really?” He says in a voice that cuts through Bryan’s heart.

“Yes. Yes, Aaron. I’m so glad you opened your heart to me. You’ve always had such an amazing heart.” Bryan puts his hand on Aaron’s chest. “And I want everything you want.”

“I’m glad to hear that… I really am. But speaking of hearts, you _broke_ mine last night, Bryan. You did some really gnarly shit. Not just how you reacted when I told you, but… you don’t even remember trying to kiss me?”

Bryan looks at him in confusion. “I did _what?”_

“Yeah. You kissed me--well, more like you rammed your tongue down my throat--and then after I shoved you back, you threw up.”

“Oh, my god. Oh, god, Aaron. I’m so sorry. I don’t… how humiliating. To treat you like that… I’m horrified. I just didn’t know how to deal with my feelings about what you said, I suppose. I handled it in the worst possible way.”

“Yeah. It was pretty bad.” Aaron still has tears in his eyes. Bryan feels like a fucking monster.

Bryan doesn’t know how to make this right. But he has to try. “I know I don’t deserve _anything_ after what I did last night, but… can I please get a second chance? To explain. Can you come back here tonight? I promise I’ll take a shower and even brush my teeth between now and then.” 

Aaron actually chuckles, but he’s still crying. Bryan finds some tissues and hands him one. 

“Please say yes. Let’s do this the right way. We both want the same thing, I promise you. And I love you.”

Aaron _finally_ gazes at him in that fond way Bryan has always craved. There’s nothing quite like a beautiful young man’s adoration and love, Bryan’s come to find. “Yeah. I can do that.”

“Thank you,” Bryan says, overwhelmingly relieved. “Thank you.”

Bryan wants to take him in his arms, hold him, and god, kiss him, but he knows Aaron needs some time before that happens.

“I have to go now,” Aaron murmurs. “Will you be okay?”

“Yes. Go. I’ll see you tonight. And Aaron… I’m so sorry.”

“I know,” Aaron says. “I know.”

Bryan watches him leave, feeling equal amounts of regret and relief.

*****

When Bryan opens the door that evening, Aaron comes in and walks right into his arms for a hug. He’s been thinking about it for hours, and while there’s still so much to talk about, he needs to feel Bryan’s familiar arms around him now; his hands on his face, his tender kiss on his forehead.

“I’m so glad you came back. I was worried you would change your mind,” Bryan says, holding Aaron by the shoulders.

“I thought about it. But I know your heart. I know that wasn’t you last night, not really. Can we… can we talk about why you reacted that way? I’m genuinely curious.”

“Of course. Where do you want to sit?”

Bryan, because he’s Bryan Cranston, has a huge, beautiful suite, with like 11 different couches and love seats and chairs to sit in--but Aaron knows where he really wants to be.

“I’ve always wanted to be the little spoon,” Aaron says with a chuckle. Bryan smiles as Aaron lays on his side in bed. Bryan carefully lays beside him, holding him close, their hands finding each other, fingers intertwined. Aaron loves the comfort of Bryan against him; god, he just loves it so much. He loves _him_ so much. But he can’t lose sight of what they need to discuss.

“I’ve been thinking about it all day,” Bryan begins. Aaron’s actually glad he can’t see his face right now. It helps. “I think… that I was surprised, first of all. And then I was touched that you were so vulnerable and honest with me, and yet I never had the courage to do the same. Because I have thought about it so many times, Aaron. I can’t tell you how much I’ve just wanted to reach over and touch your hair, or kiss your shoulder, or taste your lips…”

Aaron feels warm all over. Bryan always knows exactly what to say. Well, most of the time, anyway.

“And when I was trying to think of the right way to respond, I just… I couldn’t find the right words. I thought I might fall apart if I even _tried._ That probably doesn't make sense, but… I know you don’t realize this but sometimes I mess things up. I’m not perfect.”

Aaron laughs. “At least you’re humble.”

Bryan grips his hand harder for a second. “But in all seriousness, I’m sorry. It won’t happen again.”

“Do you promise?” Aaron says in what he hopes is not a pathetic voice. “Because I can’t… I can’t feel that way again. Broken. Empty. I can’t.”

“I promise,” Bryan murmurs. He buries his face in Aaron’s neck, which gives Aaron goosebumps.

Aaron turns around so that he’s facing Bryan. Tears start stinging his eyes again--tears of relief, happiness, heartbreak, Aaron doesn’t even know exactly. Their foreheads meet and Bryan wraps his arms around him, his hand rubbing his back in small circles.

“And you really want this?” Aaron’s voice is so soft, and so heartbreaking. 

“I want _you._ I love you so much, and I want to be with you in whatever way makes sense for us. I spoke to Robin today and she already knew--apparently she and Lauren have discussed it. In depth”

“I didn’t know that,” Aaron says, chuckling through his tears. 

“So we have time to figure it out. Whatever _it_ is. So please… please tell me how I can make it up to you.”

“You can hold me. And touch me. And god, you can kiss me… just not like you did last night.” 

Bryan groans. “I’m sorry.” He moves closer to Aaron, their bodies so close together, Aaron can nearly feel Bryan’s heart beating. And when their lips finally meet, Aaron hums a little when they connect, just out of pure happiness that this is happening. 

And now all of Aaron’s focus and attention is in this moment; time stops as he discovers how soft Bryan’s lips are, his hands on Aaron’s face, his thumbs a comforting presence on his neck. Ten years of stolen glances, hidden touches, respect and integrity and beauty and love, all culminate in a whirlwind of an epic kiss. 

As they get to know each other’s lips, the kiss deepens; Aaron opens his mouth just enough for Bryan’s tongue to explore his own. The passion of it all makes Aaron’s head spin and he never wants this to end. 

Bryan stops kissing him briefly and Aaron wants to protest, but when it’s just to take his shirt off, and then Aaron’s, he doesn’t protest at all. Because Bryan’s bare chest against his own is a feeling he isn’t prepared for--it is absolutely incredible. Bryan moans into Aaron’s mouth and it sends a shockwave through Aaron’s body. 

Tasting Bryan’s tender lips, touching his bare back, feeling his hands on his own back, exploring, touching all the skin they haven’t dared to before--being able to do all these things with the man he loves so much is nearly overwhelming. But not overwhelming enough to stop. 

“I love you,” Aaron murmurs. “I can’t believe we get to do this together. I can’t believe I can touch you like this.” He runs his hands through Bryan’s hair while he kisses him, then kisses his neck, his throat, his chest. Bryan gasps as Aaron hesitantly, then more confidently, kisses a nipple, and then licks it. 

“I love you,” Bryan murmurs, still gasping. “And I’ll never stop showing you how much.” 

They lay in bed kissing and touching each other for hours, content to not take it further just yet, to have something to look forward to. 

“I’m not going to fuck this up again,” Bryan whispers in his ear. “Promise. This all just means too much to me. _You_ mean too much to me.” 

“Good,” Aaron murmurs. “Because you already owe the hotel $50 for bottled water.” 

They laugh, but they don’t stop kissing. They will never stop kissing. 

*****

_I'm sorry, but I'm just thinking of the right words to say  
I know they don't sound the way I planned them to be  
But if you wait around a while, I'll make you fall for me  
I promise you, I promise you I will_  
\- The Promise * When in Rome - 

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to [Porkchop_Sandwiches](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Porkchop_Sandwiches) for the never ending patience and support.


End file.
